Guess who’s Coming for Dinner?’ and other Suburban Tales of Horror

In the chapter, Guess who’s Coming for Dinner?’ and other Suburban Tales of Horror, Megan Kleyn—a white SA woman with a black SA boyfriend—describes her mother as unequivocally opposed, on ‘racial’ grounds, to the relationship. Megan uses this to illustrate how difficult a mixed relationship can be to sustain, attaching significance to her mother's role in the process. Megan distinguishes three kinds of problematic responses from others to her relationship. 1st: ‘white liberals’ who applaud her relationship as if it signifies the dawning of a Rainbow Nation. 2nd: black men who construct her as a woman who desires black men and try to seduce her. Not only do they racialise her, but they sexualise and reduce her to a white alluring object. 3rd: assorted types who denigrate the relationship.

One implication is that celebrations of mixed relations are not necessarily progressive. They may end up idealising these relationships, even exaggerating levels of integration. However, the extent to which it is acceptable, common or normal is an important gauge of just how much integration has occurred in the post-apartheid context.

Reference:
Kleyn, Megan. 'Guess who’s Coming for Dinner?’ and other Suburban Tales of Horror', in Rob Pattman and Sultan Khan (Eds.), Undressing Durban (Durban: Madiba Press, 2007), pp. 112-116.